If you need to know anything about me, this photo is all you need.


This was taken around 8:15am, 45 minutes before the 2013 Red River Rivalry football game between the University of Oklahoma and Texas. This proves I am dedicated to the things I believe in, like watching students hit each other and throw footballs around.

Next, I’m grilling steak. Why? Because steak is good. What kind of question is that? Two of those are for good friends of mine who were not aware they were getting steak at 9am. I’m full of surprises (most aren’t steak-related, though).

I’m in dress socks because I’m classy.

I have dynamite calves. #humblebrag #donthatetheplayerhatethegame #rulesofthree

My hair is messy, but I don’t care. I can’t be bothered with vain escapades like doing my hair when there are more important things to do like grill steaks and watch football.

I’m holding my pug, Gizmo T. Pug (that’s his official, on-the-animal-registry name). He is in an OU football jersey. He is probably the coolest dog in the world (unless you want to hire me and have a dog, then your dog is totally better please hire me).

Finally, the woman behind the camera believes in me more than anyone and encourages this behavior. Why she hasn’t left me, I don’t know (just kidding, I do. I grill a mean steak).


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